Monday, January 8, 2007

I remember when I lost my mind

“You have any suggestions on marathons?” I asked my fitness guru/known marathon running co-worker on Friday.

She looked at me disbelievingly. “You’re running a marathon?” she said with a tone that implied “You’re not only fat, but you must be crazy,” and a quizzical look that said, “You’re fat, crazy, and going to run a marathon?”

“Yeah…” I said. “It would help me with things…” I hadn’t told her about “Get Fit or Die Trying 2006/2007” and I didn’t feel that now would be a good time to explain how I had riffed off of a 50 Cent album to come up with a humorous and motivational name for my workout/eating routine in order to motivate myself. Yeah, that certainly would not help in any way to dispel the crazy notions.

The original goal of the workout routine was to get myself in better shape by May so that when my friend gets married I can not only be the best man, but also feel like the best man. That and not die of cardiac arrest on the dance floor. (The fact that I cannot dance is a minor detail.) However, I’ve come to realize that May is a long way away and I’m going to have to set some short-term goals along the way in order to be able to reach that big goal.

I’m currently looking at some 5-mile marathons in March and April. I can barely run one mile right now, so this could be interesting. I figure March or April will be enough time for my friends to scrape my remains off the pavement and put me back together before the wedding. (Gentlemen, we can rebuild him, we can make him better than he was before. Better…stronger…faster…less geeky.)

On a related note, I know many of you have to be disappointed in the current tone of this blog. I can sense your lamentations: “I invest 2 minutes out of my busy day to read this thing, and all this idiot talks about is his stupid fitness goals.” I feel your pain my disenchanted reader, but promise you that stimulating and amusing content is on the way. Topics to look for include a politics post that will no doubt have you tearing your eyes out and wishing that you were reading an real politics blog, details on how you can support a good cause and win a date with me (just think of it as supporting 2 charities), and a recount of my fun time unexpectedly cruising DC with a fellow blogger on Saturday night.


mm said...

Good luck on the marathon. It's gonna be tough, but it's most definitly possible.

Patricia said...

Good luck on the marathon. I think it can be done. Regardless of the tone you said you'd set, I'm finding much enjoyment reading this blog.

HomeImprovementNinja said...

I don't believe in marathons. And by that I mean that I, literally, don't believe they exist. No human can run 32 miles. It's all hollywood special effects.

Across The River said...

mm and patricia: Thanks for the words of encouragement.
homeimprovementninja: I think you are on to something. Grim tales of marathons are told to couchpotatoes to scare them, "You better behave, or I'll slap a number on your back and run you till you die."